


Broken

by percyinpanties



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Angst, Curses, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Hopeful Ending, Eventual Smut, Heartbreak, M/M, very minor solangelo mind you, with lots of feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-09
Updated: 2015-04-24
Packaged: 2018-03-22 02:49:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3712006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/percyinpanties/pseuds/percyinpanties
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Percy gets cursed by Eros, Jason has to break himself to break the spell.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I made myself cry. Read with caution.

Jason looks at the sleeping boy in his bed and smiles sadly.

“That’s what you get for defiling a shrine.” He mutters to himself and turns away, needing to take a shower and wash the remains of the night before off his body. The whole situation is a mess and Jason has absolutely no idea how to get out of it. Well, that’s not true. He knows exactly how to get out of it, but he won’t let that happen.

He and Percy had been screwing around since pretty much the end of the war. With the constant threat of being killed or the world ending gone, a lot of problems in their respective relationships had time to come to light. Percy and Annabeth couldn’t work through their experiences in Tartarus, Annabeth still being scared and Percy still feeling guilty, while Piper and Jason realised that Jason just wasn’t the boyfriend Piper had hoped to make him. In the aftermath of the break-ups, Percy and Jason grew closer and eventually they started sharing more than just an occasional hug. It was merely physical, and while Jason knew there could be more, he never felt the need for it. In the end, that bit them in the ass.

They were taking care of a shrine for Eros, who hated Jason anyway it seemed, and maybe they got a little side-tracked. Needless to say, the god was pissed, mostly because they dared to exchange meaningless kisses in his of all shrines.

Percy got cursed, and Jason has to suffer the consequences now. It’s a particularly unpleasant curse, because all that changed is that Percy suddenly has deep romantic feelings for Jason. He’s completely besotted to put it lightly. What actually hurts about this thing though is that Jason knows Percy’s feelings aren’t real and that the one way he can break the curse is  _“to confess his own love and mean it.”_ Of course, as soon as he did that, Percy’s feelings would be gone, the curse taken away. Jason has no idea what to do, he’s in a moral dilemma, and his feelings get more mixed up every day.

Falling in love with Percy is too easy, Jason tries what he can not to, because if he does he’ll end up terribly heartbroken. On the other hand, he’s not strong enough to push Percy away, even if he wants to, so now they are basically dating. It’s like tasting a forbidden fruit and knowing as soon as you start enjoying it you will have to give it up. Jason could cry, that’s how much the situation tears at him.

When Jason steps out of the shower, Percy is there, toothbrush in his mouth and his whole face lighting up when he sees Jason. It’s like a punch to the gut, every single time Percy looks at him like that, because Jason knows it’s  _not real_. Maybe it would actually be easier to just commit to his feelings and get over with it, he’s basically taking advantage of the curse, enjoying this thing while it lasts. Jason feels like a horrible person and friend, but when Percy leans in to kiss him, toothpaste and all, he still doesn’t pull away.

It’s not that disgusting, Percy just gives Jason a quick peck and he can wipe the toothpaste off his lips after, but how pleases Percy looks with himself makes Jason want to hide under a pile of rocks all over again. He is absolutely fucked, terribly in love with his best friend and unable to admit it, because he knows that the other boy’s feelings are nothing but a scam. The curse is meant to break him, and Jason is pretty sure that it’s working perfectly.

“What’s wrong?” Jason’s eyes snap up to Percy’s, who has gotten rid of his toothbrush and is looking at him concerned. “You look like you’re going to cry.” He reached out and cradles Jason’s face in a hand, pulling him close regardless of the fact that Jason’s only wearing a towel and that he’s still in pyjamas. Jason thinks he probably actually will cry, he can’t take it anymore.

“I love you.” It sounds broken and it feels like Jason is running himself with a knife, the pain blooms bright in his chest and,  _fuck it¸_ there are actual tears gathering in his eyes. He waits for the inevitable rejection, presses his eyes shut in a feeble attempt to  _not fucking cry_ , but it’s no use.

Percy stumbles back, his hand leaves Jason’s face and there’s a muttered “Oh my Gods.” Before the door shuts behind Percy. He left, Jason crumbles to the floor and before he can stop it a sob wrecks through him. Eros wanted him broken and he got what he wanted, all the time Jason dragged this out only made the final pain worse. It’s like being torn in two, not even Piper leaving him felt this bad because at least back then he knew she had loved him at some point.

Percy didn’t and he doesn’t now either, with the curse lifted Jason can’t even pretend anymore that they had something real. He can imagine the god laughing darkly, enjoying Jason’s pain, while the other gods watch with cruel humour.

There’s nothing there to save him this time, he’s gotten himself into the mess alone and he’s got to get himself out of it on his own as well. Jason fears he can’t.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three weeks pass until Percy works up the guts to face Jason again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is not as sad, and I promise it ends on a hopeful note. I'm sorry for being such a cruel lil' monster.

Percy doesn’t talk to Jason for two whole weeks, he wouldn’t even know what to say if he tried.  He’s still confused, doesn’t understand a thing that’s going on in his head and can’t for the life of him don’t figure out which thoughts are his own and which aren’t.

Something really messed up must be going on, because for the past weeks, Percy had been _happy_ and _in love_ with his best friend of all people. He had spent more nights in Jason’s bed than in his own, and their occasional fooling around had become so much more and… Percy misses it now.

The thing is, Percy knows that all those fuzzy feelings, they were not his own, because he knows for a fact that they weren’t there before and that two weeks ago they suddenly vanished like someone had untied a ribbon and freed his heart again. It does nothing to soothe the ache in Percy’s chest though, the feeling that something is missing and the knowing that it’s Jason who’s not by his side anymore. Even worse, Percy doesn’t know how he felt anymore before this whole mess began, and if it’s different from what he feels now… He doesn’t how exactly Jason comes into this either.

After almost three weeks of brooding and avoiding each other, Percy has enough. Apart from the fact that he really can’t see Jason hurt any longer – and it’s pretty damn obvious just how much he is hurting, no matter how hard he tries to hide it – Percy is beyond done with this whole mess. He needs to _know_ what happened, and why, needs to understand how he possibly managed to fall in and out of love with his best friend, probably breaking him apart in the process.

 

Doing that by just sitting on Jason’s bed and waiting for him after the campfire might not be the best of plans, because when the door opens, Jason is not alone. He is holding Nico on one hand, which would be surprising enough all on its own, but on top of that, his free arm is slung around Will.  
For some reason, Percy feels a little betrayed by this. He’s been spending more time with Will than with anyone else since this thing with Jason went down the drain, and he had somehow expected that Will would tell him about something like this after all the crying Percy had done with his head in Will’s lap in the infirmary.

All three of them freeze, and Percy almost feels better when Will smiles guiltily at him. On Jason’s other side though, Nico’s face darkened like he’s seriously considering strangling Percy for just coming here without warning like this. Percy can’t even blame him.

Will is the first to move, he untangles himself from Jason and reaches for Nico instead, slowly pulling him away as well. It’s obvious that Nico is reluctant to go, Percy hears Will whisper “C’mon, they need to do this sooner or later.” and sees Nico squeezing Jason’s hand a final time before he lets go as well.

Then they are gone, and Jason still stands frozen in the hallway, looking like he’s going to cry. It’s like a punch in the stomach, but Percy swallows around the hurt tying his throat shut and gets off the bed to walk toward him. Jason’s eyes don’t leave him for a second, like he’s afraid Percy will run away if he does and frankly, Percy really feels like doing so right now.

But Percy doesn’t, he knows that he can’t do this to Jason again, bad enough he ran the first time around. He walks up to him and on a whim, wraps his arms around Jason, pulling him into a tight hug before he even knows what he’s doing.

“I’m sorry.” Percy whispers, and he is. Not for any feelings or the lack of them, he’s pretty sure he can’t actually do anything about that, but for being a coward and running when he should have stayed and let Jason help figure out _what the hell happened_. For the pain he’s caused as well, for having let Jason suffer almost three weeks before Percy managed to get his shit together and come here.

Jason doesn’t move, and that in itself hurts Percy more than having seen him coming in with Nico and Will earlier. It’s not his place to be hurting now, not with how much hurt he has caused Jason in the first place. He still doesn’t move away, just rests his head in the crook of Jason’s neck and waits for him to snap out of his stupor, either hug Percy back or push him away.

Nothing happens for a while, then Percy feels something wet drip onto his face. He pulls away, eyes wide and indeed, Jason’s crying. Jason’s face is turned away like he’s trying to hide it, and his lip is drawn between his teeth, but when Percy’s trying to pull away – thinking he’s done more damage than good, Jason catches him with a hand around his wrist.

“Don’t go.” The way Jason’s voice catches on the second word makes Percy want to punch himself in the face. Right now, that’s no use though, so instead he goes back to pulling Jason close against him. This time, Jason winds his arms around Percy in return, and it feels like this is actually a beginning again.

“I don’t know what happened.” Percy admits after it’s been silent for too long again. He has this part all planned out, has rehearsed what he’s going to tell Jason in all the nights he couldn’t find sleep for the life of him and didn’t have the steady breathing of a person next to him to pull him under.  
“One second I was absolutely… in love.” It takes a little to say this aloud nevertheless, so far the only one Percy actually managed to tell was Will… “And then it was like someone flipped a switch and took away everything. I… I still don’t know what in my head is mine and what’s not.”

The shaking in Jason’s shoulders gets worse and Percy starts rubbing gentle circles between his shoulders. At least it’s out now, Percy tells himself, they can move forward from here, or at least they won’t fall back anymore.

At some point, Percy manages to start pushing Jason more into the cabin, until eventually, they sit curled up together on the couch and Percy tries to wipe Jason’s tears away. Every tender gesture seems to make it worse for Jason though, and it’s a while before Percy gets why. It’s too much like what they had before, and neither of them really understands what that means yet, so for the moment it’s a painful reminder above everything else.

“You got cursed.” Jason’s voice is barely steady enough to talk, so instead of answering, Percy gives him the time he might need to go on. There’s a lot of shaky breathing and wiping away tears before they spill, but eventually Jason gets the story out, the whole one, starting with Eros cursing him and ending with Percy breaking Jason’s heart without a clue what’s going on.

When he’s finished, Percy curls up in Jason’s lap, legs wrapped around his waist and head hidden in the crook of Jason’s shoulder, whispering over and over that he’s sorry for _how much_ he hurt Jason and that he hasn’t even understood just how bad it was before. Jason doesn’t answer, he holds Percy close like he’s drinking in his warmth and maybe, just maybe, they can be alright again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think. (I've started writing on a third part because this seems to be the only thing that makes it through my writer's block atm.)  
> Thoughts? <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the aftermath of Eros' curse, Jason learns to accept that he doesn't need to voice his feelings for them to be real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had things to do, instead I wrote this. Have some smut with feelings.

Skin slides against skin and a soft moan fills the room. Jason has his legs hooked around Percy’s back, both hands tangled in his hair as Percy kisses his neck, hands holding Jason where they are wrapped around his shoulders. It doesn’t feel as much like sex as it does like making love, every movement is slow and tender, every kiss lingering, and Percy’s taking all the time he has without being a tease.

In a way, it’s like Percy’s trying to make up for every second they spent apart, and even more for every one they were living a lie, making sure Jason knows that this time around, every bit of love between them is real.

It was a long and hurtful process to get here, and some days Jason is still wary, fears that it’s not going to crumble like an autumn leave under his shoe again, that Percy might leave after all. Every time, Percy reassures Jason he won’t, that he _loves him,_ even when Jason is still scared to say it again himself, like the curse is still there, still a looming threat in the background. Maybe even that is part of Eros’ punishment.

Percy brings Jason back to the present with a slow roll of his hips and a drawn out moan that maybe was supposed to be Jason’s name. He has raised himself up on an elbow, and his fingers are tracing the lines of Jason’s face now. The fondness in his eyes is almost overwhelming, and Jason has to pull him down for a kiss before he’s going to start weeping like a child. It’s not much better, Percy hums against Jason’s lips and even this feels like it’s loaded with emotion. Sometimes Jason feels like Percy is trying to make him fall apart, but not with pain and rejection, but with more affection than he can possibly take.

Even this slow kind of pleasure is driving Jason surely and steady closer to the edge, and he knows by the way Percy’s breathing comes heavier that he’s getting there too. Their skin is covering in a thin layer of sweat, making them fit even easier together and adding to the slickness of Jason’s cock leaking between them.

“Perce…” Jason gets cut off by Percy pushing deeper, pressing closer against Jason and changing the angle of his thrusts. Their foreheads are resting against each other, kisses getting to messy with the coiling in their guts getting more intense, so all they do is sharing every breath while Percy does what he can to turn Jason into a moaning mess underneath him.

Jason feels Percy’s hand slide down his chest, sees the curve of his lips when they form into a smirk, but all he can do is give a wrecked moan as soon as Percy’s fingers trail over his length. He arches off the bed ever so slightly, and Percy takes advantage by thrusting deeper than before, making Jason stifle a cry before he does wrap his fingers around his cock after all.

After that, Jason doesn’t last long anymore. He’s been tethering close to the edge for a while now and Percy seems intent on taking him apart and piecing him back together with this new rhythm of slow rolls of his hips and wicked strokes, going back to nipping on Jason’s ear before making a path of kisses down his neck, where he sucks a new purple mark into the skin.

It’s all a little too much, and when Percy licks over Jason’s collarbone, he crumbles, coming all over his stomach, head thrown back and eyes pressed shut, whines and moans tumbling from in lips in equal measure. He’s pretty sure Percy follows close after, surely having held back for as long as it took Jason to finish and letting go as soon as Jason couldn’t hold on any longer.

When Jason opens his eyes again, Percy has cleaned up the mess between them already and cuddled close again, legs tangled and his head resting on Jason’s chest like he’s listening to Jason’s heartbeat. Percy notices Jason shift and tilts his head up, smiling softly and then kissing him even softer.  Jason rolls onto his side, facing Percy now and nudging his nose with his own.

“I love you.” It’s not coming as a surprise anymore, Percy’s words are as fond as his gaze his right before he presses his lips to Jason a second time, but like every time before, it still makes Jason’s heart jump. Percy doesn’t complain or pout when Jason says nothing in response, there’s no hurt in his eyes, only understanding, and he lets Jason tell him with a deeper kiss all the things he can’t voice.

They lie close for endless minutes, going from kissing to cuddling, to Percy nuzzling along the line of Jason’s jaw, back to kissing. Eventually, Percy’s fingers wander lower, and his soft smile turns into a cheeky one. Jason would love to let him go on, and even more to press Percy into the mattress and return the favour of their slow love-making earlier, but as it is, they don’t exactly have time now.

“Percy.” Jason’s voice is amused when Percy presses a kiss to his throat, his fingers tracing over Jason’s hip bones now. “They’re coming in half an hour.”

There’s s soft laugh in response, and of course, Percy doesn’t even think about taking his hands off Jason.

“That’s enough.” He purrs, trying to press himself closer to Jason, who only tilts Percy’s head up to steal a kiss before pushing him away carefully. He’s not going to risk Will and Nico walking in on them. This time, Percy does pout at him. “I hate movie night.”

“Don’t pretend. I know you love it.” Percy’s pout quivers, like he’s trying hard not to smile, and Jason pecks his lips before he slips away, out of the bed to get dressed and decent before they come over.

 

Two hours later they all sit in a big pile on Jason’s couch, warm and comfy, watching the first Captain America movie and listen to Nico and Percy bicker over the plot.

Percy is pressed into Jason’s side, but his head is resting on Wills shoulder, holding one of Nico’s hands who somehow managed to settle on both his and Jason’s lap, his legs draped over Will’s, who has a hand around Nico’s ankle and an arm over Percy’s shoulders, hand resting against Jason’s neck, absent-mindedly playing with the short strands of his hair.

Jason feels love, bright and blooming in his chest, pure and tender, and not as dark as it was in the aftermath of Eros’ curse. It doesn’t matter that he can’t bring himself to tell Percy, that he has trouble to express his affection for Will and Nico, even though it’s a whole different kind. They know, and he does too, and that’s all he need to be alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have you noticed yet that I have an extreme weakness for extra close friendships? Yep.   
> Anyway, let me know what you thought. <3

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are love.


End file.
